I’m just starting the book “Uninvited” by Lysa TerKeurst, and Chapter 1 is all about honesty–getting down to the core of who you are and why. It’s an ugly adventure sometimes, but a necessary one.
When I think of honesty, I think of the Biblical definition of confession. In the New Testament it’s the Greek word, homologeo, meaning “to speak the same thing” or “to be in agreement with.” I cannot truly confess (a promise, the Son of God, God’s greatness/holiness, or my sinfulness) without being completely honest. I have to search inside myself and seek to see my heart the way God sees it. I have to want Him to expose me so that I CAN confess my sinful nature and the magnitude of His grace–grace that continually covers the price on my head.
Psalm 51:6 Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being,
and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart.
It’s not enough just to know it and say it, though, is it? If I don’t make a change, the confession is void. It means nothing. The honesty means nothing. The work and diligence it takes to know my own heart and acknowledge the ugliness within it, is all fruitless without action. Wes McAdams once wrote, “If we confess God’s omnipotence in praise, but we live in a constant state of fear and timidity, we are denying our confession and proving we are not really in agreement with the truth that God can take care of us.” (Read more of Wes’ wisdom here.)
Woah. That smacked me right between the eyes. I don’t consider myself one who lives in a constant state of fear, but timidity? If I’m being honest, yes. I am much more timid than I should be as an ambassador for Christ. (2 Corinthians 5:20) Because I DO believe in God’s awesome power and what He can accomplish through me! Why then, do I not act on that as often as I should? And where does that timidity come from?
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart!
Try me and know my thoughts!
24 And see if there be any grievous way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting!
God, please continue to search me and expose my sin to me.
Expose it so that I can honestly confess it and then change.
You are Holy, and I seek to live blameless and holy in Your sight.
Carve out my ugliness & sin, and mold me into the woman you created me to be that Your Kingdom may grow exponentially and Your name may be glorified throughout the world.
Use me to change the world through raw honesty and confession of how great Your grace, love, and longsuffering is to me.